Who knew...

...a race shirt could fit into an everyday work outfit? Not me, until this morning anyway. I think my wardrobe just quadrupled.

It was decided that runners everywhere should don their race shirts in honor and respect for Boston, the marathon, runners, spectators and families. So far no one has mentioned anything to me about it, so either they A) live under a rock B) aren't runners and just don't get it C) this race shirt looks dang cute and no one even suspects I didn't get it from Nordstrom.

Yeah yeah...it's mirror image...don't know how to fix that....



I decided to wear the shirt from my first marathon, Oklahoma City Memorial Marathon in April 2010. I can't believe it's been 18 years since the OKC bombing on April 19, 1995. I remember exactly where I was, Mr. Hula's Physiology class...how could I forget Mr. Hula? And the way he used to write on the chalk board....**ahem**...anyway...News spread quickly around the school that there had been a bomb in Oklahoma City. At first I laughed. I have always felt so horrible for laughing....felt like such a jerk actually. But really, a bomb? In Oklahoma City? It sounded so absurd. Absolutely insain. Not possible...but then the librarian brought the TV out to the student center and we all gathered around. Shocked. In complete disbelief. Then came the news that there was a day care in the bottom floor of the building. Every working mother's dream, to have their child downstairs while they work, became their absolute worst nightmare....I felt sick.

The days and weeks to come were a blur. So many people came to OKC from all over the country. I remember seeing lines and lines of emergency vehicles, Red Cross Volunteers, National Guardsmen...And a photo seen HERE (you may not want to look) has been a fixture in my brian for so many years.

I don't know why I ramble on about this...but I guess just to say I chose the OKC Memorial Marathon for a reason. Even before I started running after college I imagined myself running that marathon. In 2004 my husband at the time ran the relay. Inside I was seething with jealousy. I wanted to run....fast-forward to 2008. I started running. First small races, local 5k's, 10k's then my first 12k the day before LB's dad left for Iraq.

It was then that I decided I would run one race a month until he came home. The small races became half marathons...and I ended up running 12 races in 11 months. I didn't stop. In fact I ran more...I began to see that running was so much more than just running. It was my sanity. It made me a better person.

2009 was a tough year, but I had no idea what would come in the following few years. End of 2009 I lost a pregnancy, then came 2010. I nearly divorced, endured another deployment and the loss of friends, found out my dad had cancer...the blows kept coming! Was this life? Was this how it is, how it was going to be for the next 80 years? Such extreme ups and downs? People actually enjoy this life? That is where my head was...once I recovered from my ectopic pregnancy I was cleared to run in February 2010. So I ran...

I had been saving my first marathon for the OKC Marathon. I had wanted to do Portland in 2009, the inaugural Seattle Rock n Roll in 2009. But my heart wanted OKC. So in Feb 2010 I registered for OKC one night while eating ice cream watching Biggest Loser (or at least that is how I remember it). It became real...I downloaded Hal Higdon's Novice 1 Marathon Training Plan and I stuck to that plan like glue. The next three months of training were amazing and life-changing.

During that marathon I felt like I would never become tired. Truth be told I wish I had run faster, that was my BQ race. I was scared of the wall that never really appeared, I ran conservatively because I was told it would be there. The people lining the streets of this race were so supportive. I remember at mile 23 seeing a fireman in all his gear running. Trust me, tearing up and getting a lump in your throat at mile 23 is NOT a good idea. I had an immediate flash of the photo I referred to earlier and nearly tossed my proverbial cookies....The entire race I read Bible scriptures on the backs of shirts. I read names along the way of those who we were commemorating, I was touched.

I had done it. I finished that marathon in 4:09 and some change. My dad, my LB and my TFF were there....like always and I could not explain the surreal experience  I had just had. It was like four hours of complete meditation. I would give anything to experience that again.

Anyway, I have no idea how to wrap up this sap-fest of a post. I don't pretend to know what it was like in Boston yesterday. But I do know how it feels to see your city under attack....and I know that during times of tragedy there is also so much good...just like Mr. Roger's mom told us:

“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, "Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.” ― Fred Rogers

So that is what I will do....I will look for the good, for those who help...

Boston....

Heart officially broken...

I can't seem to wrap my mind around what happened today.

I don't want to wrap my mind around it because that would make it real....you know me and my head-in-the-sand approach to life's events....that works sometimes. But not this time.

It is so sad and scary to think that this is the world that our children are growing up in. One where it is a very real possibility that a bomb could go off at a marathon, a football game, a concert....heck anywhere!  When I was growing up I worried about tornadoes. And quicksand. 

I never worried that there might be a bomb.

Just like when Sherry was murdered while out for her regular run, we came together as a running community and made it clear that we would not be broken. Our hearts, yes...broken. But our spirits, notsomuch. This Sunday I'll show up for the Boston Memorial 5k here in Fayetteville.  If you want details on the run email me and I'll give you the info. 

Hug your runner tonight. And if your a runner hug your support crew, those who are there....every.single.race....to clap you across the finish! Hug your kids, whom you do this for every day.  Show them it's ok and to not give up, to keep going.  Look at your running friends...many of whom were there today, expecting to have the race of their life, the marathon they have worked so hard for...tell them they are freaking awesome. Lastly, look at yourself. Find your inner strong, grieve for the runners, families, spectators affected today. Grieve for the marathon...grieve for the days when we didn't have to worry about some idiot(s)....(fill in the blank here....)

That time of year again....

Almost. It is finally starting to feel like spring. The sun is shining and it's supposed to be 81 degrees today! Its time to come creeping out of my winter shell and I couldn't be more ready! Last summer was full of epic beach trips and I know this summer will be the same. LB and I took a long weekend trip to Hilton Head Island this past weekend. It was nice to get away. While I didn't do too much running LB and I did take a long walk on the beach and we had a few races...I let him win a few times. Saturday he told me, "Mom, my little ole legs are sore." I asked him to show me where they hurt and low and behold mine were sore in the exact same spot! I'm sure it was from walking and running on the beach barefoot.  Here is my weekend in a quick recap:

While driving to Hilton Head in the pouring rain my windshield wiper FLEW off....

We had to survive until the nearest exit so I could find a place to replace it. LB was laughing hysterically as I yelled at Siri for not having a clue where the nearest Auto Zone or Walmart was. Sometimes I wish Siri had a face so I could punch her in it....

Thursday and Friday were kinda rainy and overcast, but we had a good time anyway. No one else wanted to be out on the beach....

 LB didn't care...he was going to get in.

But then the sun came out and all was good....

Since my last post about priorities I have had some time to think and reflect. This almost always happens, every year. I am so hard on myself come end of the winter and then find myself coming around with the sunshine and warmer weather. I looked at the Inside Out Sports and Set Up Events Triathlon series and have picked a couple that I'll register for. I'm pretty excited! I've set my bike up on the trainer on the back porch, went for a run last night when we got home and then again this AM. I also hit the gym....haven't gone to a real live gym in quite some time. Now I just need to squeeze in pool time and I'll be set. 

This weekend's half marathon is still up in the air. I'll see how the rest of the week's runs go. I'd be ok with totally skipping out, probably more ok with that than earning myself yet another PW. A girl can only get so many PW's before she really starts to feel bad about herself...but deep down I know that it is way better to go out and make it from Point A to Point B, no matter how long it takes, than to just not show up. But my competitive side cringes at the thought of a half that is not up to my personal performance standard. I haven't been putting in the work so I can't expect a stellar performance....

I know better than to expect what I did not earn...I also know that if I really truly want it I have to work for it. Maybe it's time to get to work...

Priorities People...

Where are my priorities? I've been asking myself this a lot lately. It is no secret I have been struggling to maintain my love and commitment to running since I moved to NC. I have been trying so hard to force something that's just not there....the spark is gone.  Even though I want so badly for it to be, it's just not. It's gone.  It's just not the same anymore. When I think back to the hundreds of miles I spent with RED, Tall Mom, AN the RB, my heart beats faster and my eyes tear up. I miss you all..... I have written many posts about my Running Buddies and how much I love them...and how much I owe them, how much they kept me going, physically and emotionally, over the miles we spent together. I'd give anything for a good long run with each of you....But reality is you are far, far away....too far for a lunch run, or a Saturday long run.

This brings me back to my priorities. What are mine these days? I hardly even know anymore. I've decided to back off of running. Stop pressuring myself to do it. It's not working as a stress reliever or an escape anymore. It's a chore. But these days I need something to reduce stress. With the nature of my job I take on so much, so much emotional pain of others, on top of my own, and it starts to weigh heavy on my shoulders. I can feel it a lot lately. Since I have cut back on running I can feel the tension in my muscles and the weight of it all I can see in my face....I have been holding on though, waiting for summer. Waiting for the beach! Last summer that was my outlet. That is where I went and let the sand, sun and salt water just wash it all away. I am so close now! 

In the mean time, the times between when I have to work and can't just sit on the beach, I have been increasing my yoga practice. It's helped a lot, except for Friday when J-Ninja drug me to a power yoga class that literally killed me. My arms and back and butt are still sore.  I'm hoping to hit up the outdoor pools for some lap swim and Rachel has been asking about doing some Tris with her this summer. So maybe I'll dust off Nelly and get back in to the Tri scene.  That brings a smile to my face! 

Saturday I hit up the Renaissance Day Spa, thanks to my amazing fellow PNW Transplant friend...I have amazing friends, what else can I say?

Doesn't get much better than this!

So for now, because I can't hit up the spa or the beach every day, I'll run when I want to....I do have two half marathons coming up. One is on April 14th. I'm not exactly ready and I may just skip out on it. I guess I'll decide 5 Mile Style.....the night before.

Outside of running, yoga, tris, and the beach, LB and I decided to plant a garden. It should keep us busy throughout the summer. We worked on it all afternoon, digging up sand and mixing in "good garden dirt". Digging is a heck of a workout and my arms and back are killing me. But it was (and will be, since I'm only half way done with our round, circular garden) totally worth it when we have fresh fruits and vegetables!

Lazy Dog helped me plant herbs for the porch.....and some flowers.

LB digging out one quadrant so we could add the good dirt to our sand.....

And half of our circle garden is planted!!

I think it looks pretty good!

I Finally Found You! A Zensah Review...

Finally, after all this time....I have found THE One....The one and only, the best, the most fitting, my newest Go To....It just fits...It feels like home to my girls...So much so that sometimes I sleep in it. Sometimes I just put it on because. And usually I dig through my stack of other sports bras for this one. I make sure it gets washed ASAP so I can have it for my next run or workout.

There it is...right on top. =)

***Dudes, this is where you can just move on, head to the next blog on your blog roll. Unless you're in the market for an amazing sports bra, or your partner is, in that case feel free to continue reading. 

The Zensah Seamless Running Sports Bra does not disappoint, like most of Zensah's compression products. It is designed to fit all body types and since it is seam-free there is less friction and rubbing-read less chaffing! The racerback is cute, fits under most of my racerback tanks (read ALMOST SUMMER AND TANK-TOP RUNNING WEATHER). And since I know this is important they offer 12 color choices...TWELVE! If you check out the reviews on the Zensah site, this bra has received a 4.7 out of 5 rating.

The Pros:
Breathable-I never feel hot, stuffy, or like I am wearing a thick piece of cloth.
Comfortable-Feels like wearing a very comfy shirt that holds the girls gently but securely...it moves with me, not against me. Once I almost freaked out because I thought I forgot to wear a bra. I had to look down my shirt to see it was actually there...
No Seams=no chaffing
Durable- I have worn and washed this bra at least three times a week since end of November. It still seems brand new!
Good Support- Again, my girls are gently held tight and in place without the tight, restricting feeling.
Straps stay in place- They just do. They don't move or slide. The stay put.
Cute and classic design-self-explanatory.

The Cons:
Moisture-Really the only thing I can even say about this bra is that after a good sweatfest it does feel wet.  Although I never notice it though until I take it off...then I realize just how wet it is. But while it is on, it is still breathable, even when soaked.

The back of my Zensah bra

Here is a picture of all my sports bras right now....and a brief description of each...just so you can have an idea of what I am basing my review on.

Left to Right:

Lower Light Pink=Target, chaffs, elastic has gotten hard and no longer stretchy

Black=Reebok, tight, very good support but sacrifice some comfort for that support

Black and White Floral=Lululemon, just looks cute. Good for maybe lifting weights and looking cute....

Top left White=Hind. One word--CHAFE. Very good support but chaffs the top below my neck and the shoulder blades. Once chaffed off a mole! I had to go to the doctor to make sure I wasn't going to die of skin cancer. Freaked me out. 

Top Middle White-UnderArmor,  good support. Chaffs. Rubs below the girls, rides up and not great coverage.  

Top right white-Addidas, not very good support, becomes soaking wet.

Bottom Middle White=Moving Comfort, love it. Second favorite bra. Cotton. straps can rub. Never chaffed with this bra.

Bright Pink=Some cheap off brand, looks cute under a tank in the summer. 

Top Right Black and White=Some random triathlon brand, good for tris. From the swim to the bike to the run not much to complain about here. Pretty good and functional tri bra.

Blue=Zensah!! You know how I feel about this one.....My favorite, go to bra!

So there you have it, that is what I am wearing these days. I love the fabric, the fit, and the available colors that Zensah provides. This is a company that just gets it. They understand what we, as women athletes, need and want. If you haven't checked out Zensah or the plethora of products they have now is a good time! Summer is coming and it's time to add some bright, fun colors to your underwear collection! 

*I was provided the sports bra to try and review. However the opinion and review is completely my own.

What Have I Been Doing?

That's the question I've been getting a lot these days....

I've actually been doing  A LOT! Just not taking the time to sit down and blog about it. For that I apologize. So I will catch you up in a few pics and whatnot in reverse order, from today back....

I ordered and received today a 6 week Kettlebell workout.  After nearly throwing my PS3 out the window, I had to literally Google: How to play a DVD in a PS3 in order to figure out how to play the stupid DVD. But it finally worked! I did Week 1 Cardio 1 work out and OUCH....I'm gonna be hurting tomorrow.

I've been going to lots of LB's soccer games...and it's been cold. So cold I took my snuggie out!

I've been going to a lot of Hot Yoga...it's so so great. And hot....

I met with Sarah and Rachel for birthweek lunch on Saturday...almost another year older...Wow, how far I've come in one year. 

I've been doing some running...

I also went to GNC to pick up some supplements and protein powder....

So there you have it, the short version of my past few weeks. I have my next half marathon coming up in 4 weeks. I'm only slightly, kinda, almost close to being ready. I'm hoping it's not another PW but it very well could be. I'm ok with that....

Darker than the Dark Side...

Is there anything darker than the "Dark Side", you know, The Dark Side AKA Triathlon? 

I think there might be to us Road Runners....it is called Trail Running. It is amazing and horrible and wonderful and painful and glorious and terrifying and great and awful all at the same time. It is confusing to have all these feelings about one thing to say the least. 

This past weekend my newest running buddy invited me to hit some trails.  I felt the need to attempt to totally redeem myself of the  Raven Rock 10 Mile Trail Race Epic Fail. My first week of half marathon training has gone quite well with me logging a whopping 15 miles. Ugh...that's all?! Well it will only get better from here on out. I did my weekly runs on the road and felt pretty good considering I am definitely starting from scratch with my base. To spice things up a bit  for my weekend long run of 5 miles I headed out to The Umstead National Park to hit the trails. I've wanted to do this for quite some time but had a few road blocks.  Running trails is a bit intimidating to me, especially when they are new and unfamiliar to me and if I'm by myself.  

The plan, at least for me, was 5 miles, but as I am learning trail running isn't always laid out in perfectly measured even distances that allow for me stop on the dot when the Garmin beeps "5.00".  Either way, the run was beautiful, at least the parts I dared to look up and around at. Mostly I was watching my feet so I wouldn't bite it, like I did a few weeks ago (I'm healing up quite well, thanks for asking...). I finished up with 5.75 miles. Totally redeemed myself.

Trail running is a whole new ball game. With road/sidewalk running you just have to watch for the occasional crack in the sidewalk or dip in the road. Heaven knows I have eaten my fair share of pavement, and it tastes, well....like pavement. I really didn't want to fall so I watched each step and am proud to say I didn't fall...not once! Win!

Looking at the elevation I now see why mile three to four was so awful...a full mile up! I need more hills in my life...

Elevation 

GPS of the run

Yes, I took a few pictures of the trail, only when the trail was safe enough (read flat and no trees or rocks to maneuver through, across, over, under) for me. 

It certainly was pretty and a nice change of pace/scenery and I am excited to head back out there for as many of my long runs as I can.  So maybe I wont fight the conversion to trail running after all.... 

Scratch...

And I'm not talking homemade biscuits from scratch, I'm talking running from scratch.

I ran a mile this morning. It was amazing. Amazingly awful. It was cold and windy and stupid outside. I made it about half a mile from the house and thought, "Meh, good run." Turned around and ran home. Something has to change. I need new scenery, a renewed commitment, a treadmill, a race, a goal, and plan.

Well I have begun working on the last three. Thanks to Jolene over at Journey of a Canuck Mom on the Run I have decided to register for the Run Raleigh 1/2 Marathon in April. I think this is just enough time for me to get my rear in gear.

So...
Race:    Run Raleigh 13.1 on 4/14
Goal:     Sub 1:55
Plan:     Hal Higdon Novice I

I think that's a good start....