Recently I was looking back over my older blog posts. I kind of refer to that time as
My Glory Days. I wonder if it ever will be the same? If it
can be the same. How can I get back to where I was? Short of packing up and moving back to the beautiful PNW I don't think it can ever be just the same. But I realized I have been chasing that Runner's High, I have been searching for it, longing for it...thinking about it. And it eludes me. But I have also found that the Runner's High can be accomplished via other forms of exercise too.
I have been doing different kinds of workouts the past year. After my knee injury at Big Sur running became more difficult and I realized I needed to give my body a chance to heal, not only physically but emotionally too. Divorce can take a toll on a person in many different ways. My weight was below what it had been in years but I was having a hard time eating healthy. I wasn't sleeping well. I was anxious and depressed and often didn't know which way was up. Transition is hard and my life has been in transition since 2002 when I joined the Air Force and moved away from Oklahoma. But isn't that the same for all of us? We are all constantly changing? Growing? Evolving? Healing? So I decided to take the pressure off myself and just do whatever.
After my shoulder surgery just over a year ago I struggled to find a way to get fit. As soon as I could I joined the Master's Swim Team and that has been amazing. My cardiovascular endurance is beyond what it has ever been. I swam only for months. Finally around December I decided to do a little bit of weights but it proved to be too much. So I kept swimming and only ran a little bitty bit.
Then finally in May I decided it was time. My shoulder felt strong. I felt good emotionally. I was starting to settle in after my transition from North Carolina to Oklahoma. But some things were missing; friends, community, accountability. So I went WAY outside of my comfort zone and signed up for a free week of CrossFit at
CrossFit Landrush. I signed up on line and decided I would go to the Saturday morning class. When I got there I was greeted and introduced to everyone. The coaches and other members were so nice and I felt right at home .
I've been an athlete all my life. I am no stranger to hard work, dedication, training, pain, and pushing the limits. Crossfit is no different. When I played basketball there were days I wanted to quit, I wanted to lay down and just put my feet into a bucket of ice water. I played on sprained ankles and cracked knee caps, bloody noses, and a chipped elbow. I had no limits. I played. I endured. I had no choice. When I ran cross country there were miles I wanted to die, times I wanted to fall into the ditch and curl up in a ball and just wait for the next car to roll by and pick me up. Oh and then there was that one time in the Portland Marathon when I really thought about jumping off that big beautiful bridge around mile 20 or so. Whose idea was it to put thousands of runners on a bridge that far into a marathon? I can't be the only one who had that thought? But yet here I am, putting myself out there to once again test my limits, push myself.
Once I finished my first marathon there was nothing in this world that could stop me from achieving whatever goal I set for myself. I believed that the very moment I crossed the finish line and I still believe that today. Finishing my first marathon gave me a secret super hero cape and powers that are hidden from sight. So this past Saturday when we were 25 minutes into a grueling four person WOD (work out of the day) it was my turn to do the tire run, I was the last one on our team to do it. Our team was in second place and I wanted to beat the other team. So I strapped on that tire and began to run while my teammates ran alongside me carrying the weighted bars. I ran. I drug the tire. I saw the guy in front of me, my fellow cross fitter, fellow "Rushlete"as we refer to ourselves. And I wanted to pass him. And I did. It was hard and I wanted to cry but I also knew I just had to finish. I just had to get it done. So I finished my tire run and brought our team in first. It was awesome....
It reminded me of High School when I was the last leg, the anchor leg, of relays in track. I would run my fastest to try to catch up, or to make sure we wouldn't get caught. I kind of joke and say I just don't know any better, but really I know that physical fitness and performance is so mental, the psychological aspect of sports is so important and a huge component of success. My first swim with the Master's Team after my shoulder surgery I jumped right in and swam 2300 meters. If you aren't familiar with swim workouts that is far...I mean FAR, 1.42 miles to be exact. And I did it. So I think I just didn't know better. Same goes with CrossFit. I know it's hard, but I don't know it's supposed to be really hard. So I do it. I kind of wine about it, but I do it...
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Tire Pull....surprisingly difficult! And the Signature Pose! |
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Fellow Rushletes! |
So I have been doing CrossFit now for about 2.5 months and I feel stronger. I feel great! And I feel like I belong to a community of people like me....much like my running crew. I still miss my running buddies, more than I care to allow myself to think about. But for now I am here, pushing myself and accomplishing more and more each day. I hope to run the Oklahoma City Memorial Marathon in April 2016 and I look forward to seeing just how swimming and crossfit compliment my run. Who knows? Maybe there is a BQ just around the corner!?