Monday, November 10, 2014

Things I Wish I Had....

I have too much. Too much STUFF.  One perk of the military lifestyle is purging every time you move. Since 2002 I have moved  8 times, central USA to coast to coast to coast to coast. That's a lot of packing.  A lot of boxes. A lot of STUFF.  And every single time I'd wonder, "Where does all this stuff come from?!" And I'd vow to not let it happen again.

It has become clear to me that the things in life that I need, that I want, that I long for, are not in fact things

Some things are necessary; food, clothes (unless I move to a nudist colony-not gonna happen), shelter. But most everything else is just extra. It's Life Fluff. Life Fluff can get out of control and begin to feel stifling, overwhelming.  It starts to make the walls close in, the bank account seem too empty, and the clutter just slowly takes over. Minimizing is hard. I have had years that are better than others. I am currently starting to feel a bit overwhelmed with my stuff again. I got rid of a lot when I moved to OK and again it seems to slowly seep back in....I have been trying to do better and practice more mindful spending. I have realized over the past 4 months that I can live much more frugally than I had been. I have realized that I don't really need those new boots or that super cute shirt. I have really begun to evaluate what is important in life and I continue to find myself thinking about all the stuff I have.....and the annoyance it brings to my life; digging through my kitchen cabinets, through all the random things I NEVER use to find the ONE thing I do use, squeezing past the junk in my garage to get inside, searching through loads and loads of laundry for my favorite Saturday lounging outfit, dumping out my hair tie basket to find the only hair tie I ever use, digging through my basket under my bathroom sink to find my deodorant....buried under a million bottles of get the idea.

I need to once again minimize.

I have realized that the things I wish I had are not actually things. I wish I had more stamps on my passport. I wish I had a garden....ok, so maybe that is a thing, but it's a different kind of thing. I wish I had a good long run with some of my favorite running buddies (J-Ninja, RED, Mel....). I wish I had a Friday night at Roland's, the dancing studio in Fayetteville, waltzing, swinging, and foxtrotting the night away. I wish I had a weekend on the beach, to sit and watch the sun rise with the sand and salt water rushing up over my legs. I wish I had an afternoon to sit on my porch, in my rocking chairs catching up with old friends. I wish I had a night to set up my camera and tripod to take time lapse photos of the stars with an old friend. I wish I had one more day with my dad, just to sit beside him and hear his voice.  I wish I had a week to spend in the mountains of Colorado, to hike the trails where I went as a kid. I wish I had a Saturday afternoon coffee date with The Sailor's Wife. I wish I had the means to help more people, to give to charities, the poor, hungry, and sick. I wish I had more memories playing on the trampoline with LB in the back yard. I wish I had shot the bow and arrow at the hay bail more often. I wish I had swam out into to ocean with him more than just sitting and watching him play....I could go on and on. What I have realized is that moments are so brief. My iPhone, computer, blog, will all be there later. But right now, this moment, is here only for right now....and want to live it fully!  I am working to collect memories, not things.

So there you have it....the things I wish I had.....

1 comment:

  1. It seems I've been purging my stuff forever, but more the past year. I've decided, enough! I want to see things, and places, and do things, not have things. It's hard to transform my husband though...


You're pretty much awesome!!


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