Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Dear 2012:

Yes, 2012....you were a year. A year of changes, good and bad. A year of obstacles, hurdles, and a road full of bumps. But you were also a year of growth and change for the positive. I have found myself being ME again, being carefree and independent. As I close my eyes and try to recall many of the events of 2012 I see a fair mix of positive and negative. I think, I know, the biggest, most life-changing event of 2012 is separating from my husband. At the time and the months that followed life felt hard, impossible, and no fun. I could not see that it would get better or easier. I held hope that I would move on and find a new normal, a new life, new happiness.  I don't think I believed it. But as time went on my friends and family stayed by my side, encouraged me every day and slowly smiles outnumbered tears and I realized I was ok. I was happy. I am happy. I had new experiences and began rewriting my future. I began thinking about my goals, my hopes, my dreams...what I wanted. It was hard at first. Even scary.  I found that I had been sacrificing who I really am, and that takes a toll on a person. It becomes hard to be happy and life turns into a series of motions. Motions that bring no joy or happiness.  So 2012 is the year that my adult life restarted.....

I welcomed my fourth niece into the world in February, whom I just met over Christmas! 
Newest member of the family! 
The summer of 2012 consisted of beach trips every other weekend with LB. There is something therapeutic and healing about the sun, sand and surf. We had a great time every time... I got to see my dear friend RED and her family in the Outer Banks and another old friend, Jennifer and her family in Oak Island. Such a blessing to reconnect with friends!
Me and RED!
Me an Jen! 
LB and JT living it up in OBX!
Can we go to the beach now?
Me and LB! 
I was honored to be in my TFF's (Total Friend Forever) wedding in WA in August, which allowed me to visit the city where I fell in love with myself and with running. I also found on that trip that I really didn't need that city to be happy...in a sense that trip set me free from wishing and hoping that I was still living there and allowed me to be happy where I am now. Not to say I don't love all my PNW friends to pieces and wish I could see them every day, but more that I am now able to be content with where I am and can look back on Tacoma with both positive and hurtful memories.

Beautiful Bride and amazing friend!!! 
This year I also started a new job, self-employed as an independent contractor. It has been hard work but my business is doing very well and I am LOVING it. I am so grateful to have a job that I enjoy doing every day.

And most recently, like just Sunday 12/30, my grandmother passed away. She was 92 1/2 years old. We saw her on Christmas Day. She came out to my mom's house to celebrate Christmas and to see her grandchildren, great grandchildren, her daughter and daughter in-law. She had seen everyone in her family and I truly feel like she knew it was ok, we were ok....and she passed away painlessly.

LB and Great Grandma on 12/23/12

I know there are many more highlights of 2012 but I just don't have the time to rehash them all here...and sadly I didn't do a very good job of keeping up with my blog over the past year. Maybe in 2013... 

As far as running and races in 2012....this hasn't been the best year. I found a large gross cyst in my knee that led me to DNF Big Sur marathon. That was a huge blow to my racing ego....I recently also DNF'd a trail race (less than a week after coming down with the worst flu ever, but who's making excuses). I did a few small local races that went pretty well to include a new 12k PR, which is great.

So overall, 2012 was an OK year as far as fitness. I didn't do a single a triathlon and poor Nelly sat in my garage and didn't hit the road one single time. Which leads me to 2013...

Many people have changed the terminology from Resolutions to Goals. I got curious and looked up both words to see which would be best for me.

I am choosing to make Resolutions. Goals are good but Resolutions seem to be more of what I need...not a soft goal....oh yeah maybe I'll accomplish it but a firm resolution of yes, I resolve to do this!

I am still thinking on my Resolutions and will return this evening to post them....for now I want to make it to the Hot Yoga class in an hour.

What are some of your Resolutions? Or have you decided to set goals?


  1. What a year you've had....and of course, you came out with grace and lessons learned. Here's to 2013!

  2. Sorry about your loss..but glad you got to spend christmas with your Grandma..looks like 2013 has to be better than 2012. I haven't really come up with any resolutions..I'm going to try and be more consistent with my running...I'm going to try and hit 700 miles this year...but other than that, I guess just to enjoy friends and family and life in general. Happy New Year!

  3. What a year! I am sorry that it was such a struggle for you at times but it sounds like you've come out stronger. I am sorry for your loss. That's so wonderful you were able to see her just a few days before. Good memories to have. I hope you have a wonderful 2013.

  4. What a gift that you got to see your Grandmother for one more Christmas. Hope 2013 is beautiful for you.

  5. Happy New year!! 2012 was a challenging year for me as well, but I have a good feeling about 2013. It will be awesome!!!

  6. I too am expecting a great 2013!

  7. Cheers to a great 2013. I'm choosing resolutions and a major one is to just decide to be happy. I think it is very cool that you are happy where you are now.

  8. I feel like I've stepped away from Blogger and YEARS have passed by! So much has changed!!

    I did not realize how different the definitions were from what I would have expected. I would support your decision to go with Resolutions over Goals. I look forward to seeing what you come up with. I'm working my own still, so we both have time. As long as they're out before New Year's Eve. haha

    Look forward to catching up!!

  9. What a year you have had! I consider you a very brave woman to have made the moves that you did. And I am happy that you are happy!!!!

  10. I love the beach! Especially fell in love with OBX. :-) you know there's a marathon there again this year ;-) as far as blogger ...there's more to life sometimes! But I really enjoy following your journey. You inspire me! And goals vs resolutions? I have both. I have specific measurable goals and I have lifestyle resolutions. Here's to a HAPPY and FULL 2013!!!

  11. I am hoping to be injury free in 2013...after last years major injury (pelvic stress fracture) I am to keep it simple..run for the pleasure of running...possibly do one half marathon...maybe a 5k or 10k....but really that is it! Blessings and Happy New Year to you and yours.

  12. I went through quite the year as well in 2012 and I am so glad it is over. I think everyone goes through tough times (obviously) and we all have to do what is best and most right for us. This post really resonated with me. As I get back to blogging, and catching up, I see that you are feeling more like yourself, which is wonderful to hear. And I know it feels wonderful because I have been experiencing the same amazing feeling!


You're pretty much awesome!!


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