It is dark, wet, dreary, cold and crummy here. Blah. Track work on days like this just plain sucks. Not to mention I am so 8th grade about my running shoes, I want them to be clean and pretty. Running in the rain does not make for eye-piercing white shoes. On last weekend’s long run with Mel my shoes got a little bit dirty, they are just white now, not glowing-white. They are getting broken in and by 9:30 AM next Sunday who knows what they will look like!!!
Yesterday I had a great run with AN the RB. We hit the street with only a plan to run 4 or 5 miles. We ended up with 4.5. And a great run!
Stats for yesterdays run:
Mile 1: 9:41
Mile 2: 9:24
Mile 3: 9:27
Mile 4: 9:13
Mile .5: 4:21
Now, for the true confessions.
I think I have an inner fat girl. I know I am not exactly fat. I know that my BMI says I am in the normal range. I know I am in great shape and fit. I know I can run 13.1 miles and still have energy left for the rest of the day. I know I can squat 60pounds and bench 50 (I know that is not a lot but hey, I can do it!). I know I am athletic. But something inside me just empathizes with people who are overweight, I feel like I am right there with them when they struggle, afterall I have an inner fat girl. And then, I can’t get the image of the 5 pounds of fat (Check out Zoe’s blog HERE) out of my head and I know just where that 5 pound blob is sitting: on my thighs and my waist. It won’t budge. I cannot get rid of it. I can run further, run faster, lift more, do tri’s, water aerobics, crossfit, P90x….it will NOT budge. Truly, I am happy with where I am but I strive to be better. I have worked hard to lose 58 pounds. I bet most of my friends and even family who read this blog had no idea that I had that much weight to lose after I had my Little Buddy.
It has been a struggle. I thought it was impossible to juggle being a mom, a wife (military wife nonetheless) and being me. Then I lost me. So it was way easier to juggle mom/wife with ME not in the picture. It has taken me a long time but I have found me. ME! Hi ME! I have missed you! And now I am still learning to juggle and find balance between ME, MOM, and WIFE. It can be done. So I keep running. I keep setting goals, planning races, and focusing on ME! I love having me back and I think I am here to stay!
Today I am grateful for:
My Little Buddy and The Hubs for supporting me all this time.
My present, that I may have opened! :) More about that next time!
Run Happy Peeps!